Can I Change My Name to Daddy?
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A few days ago my 11 year old son pronounced he would never want to be the mom in the family and he was sooooo happy he was a boy. When asked why, he stated he would never want to endure the pain of birth (okay, I’ll give him that one!) and he wouldn’t want to be responsible for all the child rearing, cooking, cleaning, homework help and everything else. And, you know what? He’s right. As far as raising kids goes, the dads have it made.
Now before the dads reading this chastise me for saying that, please take a good honest look at your daily household responsibilities verses your wife. Yes, dads go to work, work really hard, pay the bills and usually take care of the lawn and cars. And, believe me, it is ALL greatly appreciated! (I know, every family is different but, in my experience, this is the typical family.) The mom, on the other hand, generally wakes up before everyone, makes breakfast, dresses everyone appropriately and gets whoever needs to be out the door, out. Then she either also goes to work all day or stays at home with the little ones (which, by the way, is definitely a full time job in and of itself, thank you very much!).
Regardless of where mom works during the day, it is the dividing of the evening and nighttime duties that shows the most disproportionate amount of work of moms vs dads. Generally, dads will come home and play with the kids a bit, throw the TV on and sit down relax from his hard day at work. Mom, on the other hand, is busy making dinner, helping with homework, giving baths and doing dishes. She may also be taking several children to different after school activities in which she has been volunteered to volunteer (usually by her kids or dear husband).
After the evening duties are complete and mom gets the kids all tucked into bed (and kisses dad goodnight since he’s already laying down ready to pass out himself), she may then take a few minutes to herself but usually not until after the dishes are done and the toys are put away. Then after the house is all locked up and any pets are taken care of, she will finally get a few quiet minutes to herself. Of course, that’s when the graveyard shift begins! When it comes to the job differences between moms and dads, this job has got to be the hardest for most. Anything that happens in the middle of the night seems to be the mom’s duty to tend to it. Whether the kids wake up, the dog is tearing into the garbage, a car alarm goes off or dad wakes mom up because he can’t sleep so he figures she shouldn’t be able to either, mom has to take care of it.
Then, just when mom falls into a nice deep sleep, her “before everyone else” alarm goes off and it’s time to get up and do it all again and again and again. Maybe I’m just biased because I am, after all, the mom of this family but I do see a significant difference in the household duties between moms and dads.
Do you think this pretty much sums it up for your family or am I completely off base? Let me know in the comments below. I’m always up for a good discussion (no bashing please!).